Tasty! The tales of a 30-something chickadee trying to find the spice in life without upsetting the natural order of her suroundings.
Life can be tasty if you know how to eat it up.
Ehh, fuck it. So the only meme I wanted to do hasn't updated since Febuary 6. Who cares? There are a lot on the site and I haven't done any of them...so if nothing else I can work backwards on them until another gets posted. Right? Plus in the comments there was this blog...oh...that got me kinda steamy....God, I know it is neither dainty nor feminine to have this savage carnal hunger for flesh, but it has been so long. Men are allowed to be starved for gratification, they are supposed to want sex. Why does it seam so unflattering for a woman? Anyway....I was going to...like do questions and stuff, right?
1. for you, is sex hotter when it is forbidden? or are you the sort that is wracked with guilt and it is not enjoyable? Is there a way to answer yes to both? Everything has a little more steam rising off of it when it is forbidden. I come from a very uptight, sexually closed off family(where my mother would have preferred we all think I was a virgin birth). When I asked where babies came from, I was given a book. No explanation, no one to answer questions, just a book with a sperm wearing a tuxedo(and no, that is not a joke). So to me, even this blog...even talking about sex, admitting how much I want it is really hot. Now I have never actually had 'forbidden sex', but if it is anything like I imagined it in my head a hundred thousand times when I was with Him("Him" is, of course the man that recently left), oh God, is it ever hotter. I had a close friend when I was with Him, and let me tell you...I had about a thousand romantic interludes with that friend in my mind. He was terribly jealous of this friend of mine, even though I never told him about my erotic fantasies, and would have made my life miserable if I had gone through with any of them...but I had every detail playing out in my mind...and often when I was left to tend to my own sexual needs this friend is the one I was imagining instead of the man I was with. I still wonder if this friend had any clue...I ended up having to give up this friend because of my ongoing relationship, something I doubt I will ever stop regretting. BUT, on the other half of the question(the guilt issues) I think if I was in a committed loving relationship, I would feel guilty. Yes, guilty, even though the man in my life would either completely ignore my naked body, begging him to come to me, or he would have violent, angry sex with me, that felt less like trying to satisfy my needs(which it never did) and more like punishing me for wanting sex...all the while giving loving, tender sex to any random woman he could find that was willing. (Ooo...bitter much, Tasty? LOL)
2. are casual sexual encounters fulfilling to you, or do you need an emotional commitment from your partner? This is hard to say, because I haven't had casual sex since high school. I guess right now, in my current situation I'd take either, or both. But, to me at least, sex at its 'best' should at least include a friendship to be satisfying. I don't mean I'm only putting out if I have exclusive rights to your underpants, but I am not sure I can enjoy lovemaking if there isn't some form of love there-in any form(romantic/friendly/etc). One of the things I love the most about erotic acts are knowing the pleasure I am causing someone, and if I don't know that someone well enough to give a shit if they are feeling fulfilled or not, I think that would somehow take away from my pleasure...OK, maybe not take away from my pleasure-it would just please me MORE to be gratifying AS I was gratified. OK, I am not making any sense now. Next....lol 3. do you think that with all of the online dating sites that cater to every fetish and desire and places like craigslist that it's more difficult to stay committed to your partner? Isn't that kind of like blaming the gun companies for the gang shootings, or the cigarette companies for the cancer? If you want to step out on your relationship, you will find a way...the fact that you don't have to work quite so hard isn't going to make you more or less likely. How many times has someone said, "Oh, I was going to cheat on my husband...but I just couldn't find anyone.". If you want to, you will....that's just how it is.
OK, I had no idea I was going to get this chatty. These might have been intended for yes and no answers. LOL I am kind of sad no one else will read these. I just don't know how to work up the courage to comment on those meme sites to draw attention to myself. The story of my life...I want attention, but I am too ashamed of my wants to ask for help with them. LOL
